Some of the more unusual news items spotted in recent weeks:

— Carnival Cruises reported a 34% rise in earnings for the last quarter. Really? I’m going to guess that none of that came from passengers who boarded Carnival cruises over the last year or so and found themselves trapped by illnesses on board, mechanical malfunctions or perhaps by the Carnival-owned ship that capsized off the Italian coast. Carnival ought to refund that profit to all those who got stuck on the company’s ships.

— Cadillac is moving its headquarters from Detroit to New York City. The company says the move will help it reach more luxury car buyers. Really? Maybe if Cadillac made better cars, they could sell more of them, regardless of where the headquarters building is located. The facts are — as anyone who drives them can attest — there are many brands much superior in manufactured quality than Cadillac, among them Mercedes, BMW, Infiniti, Audi, Lexus … and more. I can remember the good old days when Cadillac was a synonym for classy. And Dwight Eisenhower was President.

— Scientists report extreme weather caused by climate changes will endanger both coasts and make Detroit a “desirable garden city.” Great timing, Cadillac.

— Apple says it has sold more than 10 million iphone6 smartphones in less than one week. Really? Darn, and I thought it was going to be a collector’s item. Does Apple practice some form of mass hypnosis, or how else are we explain such a huge national craving for a product that is overpriced and so patently unnecessary?

— Researchers in Italy have completed a far-reaching study about the benefits of art. This sounds really good, until you read about the exact nature of the study: scientists found that looking at a beautiful painting while being shot in the hand with a painful laser beam hurts less than when looking at an ugly painting. Yes, but did they try Andy Warhol?

— NFL Commissioner Roger Goddell says the league is going to crack down on players who are involved in domestic violence. And in other news, the Pope has moved the Vatican to Las Vegas in order to get closer to sinners.